The License saga continues...

Greetings, loyal readers!

So, remember a while back we informed you about registering for our license, doing the eye test, the first aid course, etc? Well, yesterday was the first part of the actual testing for the license - the theory test.

Jack: MAKE SURE YOU READ THIS!!!

*** Warning! This is a long one!!! ***

Firstly, we thought that we were doing the theory test on Monday night at our Driving School. So, we studied all weekend, I worried myself nearly sick about the thing, and then we turned up on Monday night, only to find out that this was the Pre-test Test. The Driving School likes to test you before you go and do the real test, so that they are sure that you know your stuff, and won't make them look stupid by getting everything wrong.

So, Wednesday morning at 07:00 we turn up at the TüV to do our written test. First we wait outside for ages, in below 0C weather, until the Driving Instructor turns up. He lets us into the test room, and we wait, with around another 8 people, for the examiner to turn up.

While we were waiting, the Instructor informs us that when we registered, we didn't give the Town Hall our Australian Drivers Licenses, so they have registered us as normal Germans going for a license. This means that they expect us to have 20hrs of supervised driving training, in the city, in the country, and at night. The Driving Instructor says that it's not a problem - we will just go to the Town Hall and fix it after the test.

Finally the examiner turns up, nearly 1hr late. Well, I should say "another examiner" turned up, as the original one turned out to be sick - is it a coincidense that this was the day after Karnival (a big arsed piss up and parade)?
Belinda and I get out papers, sit down, and do the test. There were a couple of questions that I was to-ing and fro-ing with, but mainly it was pretty easy.

We both took our papers up to the examiner and returned to our seats. The other ppl
were still doing their tests, but the instructor still announced very loudly that I had passed mine with no failure points (Questions are worth different numbers of points between 2 and 5, and you can get up to 9 points wrong - there are 30 questions on the paper). The examiner also said that I could go, but I waited in my seat for Belinda's to be marked. And I waited. And I waited. And I waited.

Belinda started worrying when she heard the examiner counting failure points, because when we took our papers up, we were the only two papers submitted so far. While he was marking mine though, other ppl had put theirs on top of Belinda's. So, the examiner marked a few other papers, failing a couple of people along the way.
Eventually our Instructor came back into the room (he had gone outside for some reason), and asked if we were finished. I told him that mine had been marked, but we were waiting for Belinda's. He went up to the examiner and asked him about our tests, and I heard him say (in German), that he had already marked them and told both of us that we had passed, and that we could leave! *cough* BULLSHIT *cough* The worst part of it though, was that he added "but they mustn't understand German!". GGF MoFo! I understood you perfectly, but YOU NEVER TOLD BELINDA IF SHE PASSED OR NOT! DU BIST EIN ARSCHLOCH!

So, then we leave with the Instructor, and we go to the Town Hall. We go into one of the offices and talk (or the Instructor does) with a lady there about the whole situation. She asks if we have our registration papers, but they were at home (who would carry them with them??), so we had to go home and get them.

We then drove to our house, and the Instructor waited at his driving school for us to return. He photocopied our licenses in the meantime, so that we could give the copy to the Town Hall so that they could check on our driving record etc.

When we returned, the Instructor told us that he couldn't come back to the Town Hall with us, but all we had to do was take the copies into the girls in the License Registration-room-thingy and it would be ok...so we did....BUT!...

When we entered the room (and all this happened in German), they said "You are the Australians, right?". We said that we were, and their boss said "There are a few problems. Do you understand me?" I said "Yes, we understand a little German", to which he replied "It is best that you come back with somebody who speaks German." WTF??? So I call the Instructor and he talks with the boss on the phone. The boss then says (now in English) "Go and drink a coffee, and come back at 11:30." It was 10:15. So we left.

At 11:30 we returned, and went back into the processing room. The girls did the initial work on re-processing our registration for the license, and then asked for our Australian license. I gave the girl (who looked like she was trying to be Paris Hilton) the copy of mine, and the original...she gave me the copy back. I was a little confused, and asked "Can I have the original back?"... (the following conversation was mainly in English)

Paris: "No, we keep it."
Me: "Why?"
Paris: "Because that's what we do. You will be getting a German license instead."
Me: "But what if I return to Australia?"
Paris: "You can drive there on an international license."
Me: "But you can only drive for a few months on an international license in Australia! What if we go back for good?"
Paris: "You come back here and give us your German license, and we give your Australian license back."
Me: "And if I return to Germany?"
Paris: "Then you give us the Australian one, and you get your German one back."
Me: "But, if you take our Australian license, and we haven't got our German one yet, how can we drive? We won't have a license!"
Paris: "You can show the police the photocopy."

So, kinda confused, and kinda worried, we leave the processing room - Australian License-less. First thing that I did was call our relocation consultant and ask what was going on. She said that this is "normal" in Germany, but that the Town Hall should have given us a letter saying that our Australian licenses are at the Town Hall, in case the Police pull us over...but they didn't. Luckily I still have my Californian license, but now Belinda has nothing.

Today I received a call from our relocation consultant to say that she had spoken with the Instructor and he is pissed at the Town Hall. He is fairly pissed at them because they are claiming that we never gave them our licenses the first time we registered, and hence it is our fault. Of course, this is a load of bollocks, as I know I gave it to Paris (she processed me the first time too), and she said that they didn't need it. BITCH!

Now, to make matters worse, it apparently takes the Town Hall 3 weeks to do the background-check-thingy...and we only have 4 weeks left before we are no longer allowed to drive in Germany on an internation license. Tic toc....tic toc....tic toc... Hopefully they will be faster than usual with the processing, and hopefully everything else goes smoothly, or I won't be able to do my job anymore. An AE without a car is like...well, something really bad.

KILL ME!

Tschüß,
'Brush